Sunday, February 24, 2013
Cat Milk and the Cover of TV GUIDE!
That is a true story.
It was late. Empty lines. Semi-Twilight Zone vibe.
The checkout girl said hello, I asked her how she was doing -- feeling kind of weird about the whole cat milk thing -- and she answered honestly, "Kinda bored."
Then I noticed the new issue of TV Guide in the checkout rack.
The main cover image comes from Justified, a show from one of my two writing idols, Elmore Leonard. Just to left of Carl Webster, however, was my main character, or at least the guy who will be playing him, Josh Holloway, along with the caption, "The Lost survivor finds a new role."
In all fairness, if I could rewind the event, I wouldn't tell the bored girl, "Hey, that's my show!"
I think I deserve a pass on this one -- it is the cover of TV-friggin-Guide, after all -- but my awkward, fumbling half-explanation (as soon as I opened my mouth, I regretted it) served only to confuse and possibly frighten the poor girl, who'd been only bored to that point.
Weird, random guy slides up to the register with cat milk and starts making crazy claims.
Oh well. It was pretty awesome, seeing Holloway on the cover, and at least I learned my lesson. Next time something like this happens -- okay, that's unlikely but not impossible -- I will calmly pull down the magazine and add it to my planned purchases, leaving the poor, bored girl to write me off not as a liar or a lunatic but rather just some friendly weirdo who buys cat milk and watches TV.